Do You? When your picking up your poison, do you feel the tinge in your nerves before you drink it down? Do you catch yourself and reason that it will be just fine? I bet you do.
Beautiful and broken pieces shattered glass all along the beach & I be drinking, I be mixing, and it’s not even the weekend
I knew this would come, I knew this would happen. It’s an age old rinse and repeat cycle with stains that never come out. I have been waiting for it. I’ve learned by now what to do, but still haven’t brought myself out to do it. You always want to believe you can prove yourself wrong in these matters – But you know that’s impossible with the intuition you’ve raised.
Write and do things that hurt, move to where you need to go rather than sitting around waiting to become numb to the shit, everything counts, even the small stuff.
I don’t know myself when I’m happy. So I haven’t written. I don’t mean to say that everything that came before was sad or even rooted in it, not at all. It scares me – because I’ve learned so far that I’ve gone and ruined all the happiness that has come before. I know I only brought the inevitable to the surface – Time running its own course would have done this regardless. So I guess I took fate and spun my own jacket. Wore it out and got the fit I was interested in. I’m alright with that. I like wearing and tear. The way you feel after digging a few trenches – Like an ice cold dip in the water is the only kind of refreshing that will get you good. Yeah you’ve got to be good before you can get great, so I go that way and then when I stand up like a wolf from the tundra, hungry and with focused intent, I seek the type of warmth that can only come from filling the belly. A deep warmth the sun can only begin to raise with its rays – A feast that fills you for days
That’s the thing about life, you can be right in it, right there, spending all the time you have with a person, and unless they speak it, unless they give voice to what is on their mind, you’ll never know what they are thinking. You can have ideas, but those ideas are only your own, feelings your own. You can’t know what they are thinking, but that’s the difficulty life throws at us – It’s hard because by default we only get to live one life first hand – All the other perspectives are postulated, hypotheses, drama we mix up in our skulls in hopes that we might have found someone else thinking that it wouldn’t be so bad, to spend together that oh so precious currency we all have come into by being here.
Know you, you’ve got so much you know you want to
I know you wanna,
I know you want to yeah,
You know I wanna,
You go up higher than me some days