I had a dream I was rich – it was miserable

Not everyone feels the same, some not at all, but I see money move people.
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Ohhh you’re going to bleed. For what you want, you will suffer so long as you feel adversity is only set upon you. You’re going to throw away great things because of how you feel for the things you want, and that’s fine, and tears are fine too. But don’t crumble for a few choice words given to you the way an ATM will give you your own money.
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Eschuche decir que va terminar.

I Was Hoping She’d Let Me In

I was hoping she’d let me in, for more than a cup of tea

How do you ensure a hand won’t shake when it comes time to do what is necessary? You give it something to hold in the meantime – I want my hands on your face, on your neck, around your waist.

Talk is overrated, let’s just vibe
And love is overrated in my mind
Girl, talk is over, let’s just vibe
Just for tonight.

How long do you think it has been? No contractions here. When it feels like epochs, but the reality says a billing cycle or two; what is it you still need?

I can teach you a process, but I can’t teach you how to live. You have to do the learning to get anything out of it.

Mathematical Universe; A Beautiful Thing

“Deep down, you are a wondrous, autonomous mathematical function, with infinite capacity, seeking to find the optimal answer to yourself – which is why we are all obsessed with answers. That very drive for an “answer” is, if you think about it, the quintessence of living mathematics. What else would a mathematical universe do except find the optimal solution to itself?” – Unknown

This here is an ode to all the great thinkers prior–who did so much as they could, and even in their own greatness fell to traumas handed down to them from this world. May we all do our best to move beyond, to keep perspective, and grow. Here is hoping, with great effort to be continued, that the future will continue to stand taller upon the shoulders of those with great character each and every step of the way; that when we are confronted with the pivotal choice, we choose in the way of integrity and grit — with the lives of future generations in mind.

 

Was it really an ode? Not quite. But I’ve things to do.

Stay Wild

You do know how I enjoy the wild. I’m all about it, but the entire time we face to face, I’m looking to see if you’re one color; if you’re talking to me and you’ve got a different face for the situations we find ourselves in, then I can only tell you that I won’t try to keep with that. As soon as I see you acting brand new and showing me different cuts I’m going to have to tell you I’m not with it. Figure out who you are, and be that with me. You want to be royalty, then you know how to act.

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I step back and listen because I think that you coming into yourself is the most magical thing I could ever hope to witness. It’s a dream, an ephemeral taste, a satisfaction that lingers with only a glow. Step down into that shadow light, tear into the cosmic night with a boundless high; squelching and more fucking howls; desire palms and digits like the maws of wolves to grip you by the throat and pour the vigour of ‘oh fuck-gasp, fuck’ down into your soul.

I bet that would wake you the fuck up, and keep you chasing lightning bugs on your back-snap, does this have your attention?

I can’t take you in the shower with me because you’ll get wet–can you get wet if you’re already wet?

No One Follows Art

All the boys wonder… which part of you isn’t golden? And they’ll have to keep wondering at the novel of you. Not I, because I have my own answer — Surely your insides are made of warm flesh, as I doubt what I’ve dug is even a soft metal such as gold. If I close my eyes and turn on a light I can see, I’ve got a good taste of cherries, mezcal, and that unmistakable tang that tinges the tongue when you’ve got something delectable in mind. And I’m confident. So certain, I will reach right in through the breach without any flinch of emotion; No fear of losing what may very well be the hand of Midas. And I’m just as fine sweeping the floor with it too.

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Peach of immortality;
She took a bite,
and now I want to too.
Dulce flor, the hums need more
Hope she’ll let me polinate
I’m licking icing off the cake and I don’t even like sweet things

If I was half as beautiful as you, and naked,
I know they’d all convince themselves that they care.
And because of all the time I must spend
making sure there will be a place to sleep tonight,
I can’t figure out how I should feel about that

This is how I see you,
A blur while I’m moving;
Doesn’t matter how fast
Because I’m always at the right speed
Down a few gears so the engine slows me
Show me
Show me
I don’t think you have in you
A risk worth putting down
When you look this blue

Remember the wedding?
End up feeling worse, it’s cold.
Then you left with no one

She will. Oh she will.
But this isn’t about her anyways
Yeah this is about you,
¿Lo entiendes?
Does anybody?
I’m on to you,
I’m into you
Now I’m in you
And all I’ve got is a photograph
In my head of a good time,
Come girl, you don’t have to wait
in line for a line to a good time
All the angels singing some jagged version
of A Little Help From My Friends
Thinking about all the things I’ve said
Knowing I was leading you the way you thought you were taking me
Who got who now as a permanent image in time,
as the minutes count down,
only the fearful wish for more life.

I got hella feelings,
But I don’t even fucking care

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All you ever asked me for was time
So if I get it together, how’s tomorrow August 15th?
Will you hit the ceiling with me?

We don’t even dance no more,
You be teasing with those photos
And I keep it on the low though
Fuck what you know,
better know your worth,
no discounts
Getting all you deserve,
better know your worth, ah yeah
See I’m riding round the city
And I’m stuck on you,
Got that thing sitting pretty,
tryin’ to fuck with you

After a long blur of staying up and destructive behaviour, I dreamt again. It was only fitting that it fell upon midsummer, and of course it was at night. An incredible vision of the back your head, and other illuminated crowns. I finally walked away. I made my decision that I had been putting off, finally accepting that what I came for is forever mine – as well as gone. The well is empty of you, but not why I do what I do. Breaking through to deeper levels of shit, I am certain this is gold down here; who I am beneath the mud at the bottom’s surface.

 

I’ll Be Somewhere Committing Myself

We talked for hours, and to be honest she mentioned yah eventually,
But I don’t think it mattered…

Like the child who puts a toe in the water, then a second, next a foot followed by the whole body; Followed by elevations of the soul, elated! There is no slaking a thirst for the wild unknown, the sense of depths on all sides – even when the concept is less than novel like the tipping of dominoes – how satisfying is it to watch them fall?

But really it is not that deep,
I mean life feels good so fuck it, I’m feeling, and everything’s golden, shine shone – whatever tense you want to use, look me in the eyes while we finish what we started.

What can you do but watch as someone tries to pressure you into what they desire?
You can hit them with a real hard frame – A hammer if you wish, but most people can’t handle that sort of revelation. So go alone. Leave them at their tables, with their offering intact or not – it doesn’t matter. You will go find the real grail. Let them get drowsy and forget! The well is within you, not them. They don’t feel the tightening of will when another empty pale is pulled up! They don’t feel the nostalgia for abundance, nor recall when you poured the crisp waters into wasteful troughs!

Commit yourself, and leave them. They will hardly know your absence.

Pull the Trigger Again

Within its’ walls the balance of the world contained: struggle, vigour, magic, and 🔥🌊– casting all kinds of spells and garments across the room; I like the way you get down. Is there any time to breathe? If you come up for air, I might have to, I might have to, Bite your lip the way I do. Swaying in the night feeling your lip pulse, wondering if I’m a sweeterman as I commit you to memory

I kinda like you, girl, really wanna feel you,
I wanna feel you for real
We can do what you like. I promise then, I’ll be true.
I say I’m just an artist, she tell me that’s a fucking lie.
DaVinci-esque, everything is a dance, baby, if you’ve got this high.
Degas, the star honey, you’re my ballerina.
Do I make you want to dance real slow?
I got this money, baby. I want to spend it on you.
I got this Sunday, baby. I want to spend it with you
I got this money, honey. Melrose is more than a name.
I got these visions lady, when can I see you again?
Again
Again
Again

I wanna tell you everything, but everything just seems dumb
If I came up with a million dollar idea I wouldn’t even spend,
I got change like that, since none of it’s real.

Hard when I’m coming from a day dream,
I really like when you’re speaking that language,
That tongue got me swerving all angles,
Angel do you take me a fool?
Catch me banging you on the bathroom floor, the counter, the sofa, throw it in the shower, get it on camera
Stoic got me all discipline of assent,
Let me see who you are, what you represent,
Let me put you to the test;
Figure of speech!
And if it don’t serve then I got to put it down,
Put it down like a vice,
But I still got the grip;
Yeah I had too many last couple of nights
I may say fuck it, pull up, pull up on it, and put it down like this my last,
Touchstone cliche to say; Robin squeezed it out of the poets!
And I’m just here in my own moment
I’m here in my moment,
I got everything, decisions I’ve made,
I own it
I own it
Hands all on it
Yeah I got the grip
Drawing you like a well,
For water, for sweets
It’s not that deep, you’re right
But that’s not how I see it

For the first time I’m alive at your altar
Not sure of my verse, but it’ll
Drip from my mouth like honey

I Could Tell

God baby another hit?
I don’t know if you could stomach it
Do you know how high you are?
I’m looking up and wondering;
If I’d catch you when you fall
Or if you’ll go right through my arms

Day dreamin, day scheming,
Got my whole day planned
And you’re fucking it up again
Alright alright alright with it sure I am,
I’m with Alice in wonderland
Got some space dust and a watering can that can’t sleep,
And a lot of beautiful dogwood flowers
And a clock that refuses to tell time,
As it Screams be you,
anything forced on you isn’t true.
And I’m all about it baby,
I yell back, you’re true blue heaven,
If it’s not here on Earth
It got to be in the next hit
One more and I swear we’re back swirling again to the other day dancing bachata in the Dominican turning heads on the dance floor of your perfect order
But there is no order, it’s all random
And you must be somebody’s baby,
Got to be, the only light?
Way too many stars in the sky to pretend that that’s the true,
And to the moon, from there it all looks the new, to two inches from your face nothing changes – but dam that’s some space!

Got a new paycheck that says I can do whatever I want, but it doesn’t work like that so I burn money in the back room with my coat on

Gold was never my color, but that’s not your fault. I wear it well, a crown I will have until time removes it; I built a kingdom, and within it I erected this temple so that when I need to sleep I can crash in the pews. Yeah the type of shit we do, here is where Hozier really meant to take him-and it’s funny because in here you’re taking me. I’m the fucking, Jesus I won’t say that while we fuckin’ – but I was born sick and I love it.

I’ve Seen You Naked

It’s hard to express exactly what it is that people dig, but if you’re any sort of a risk taker you’ll soon find out.

She smokes a cigarette and it’s fucking gorgeous. I think one drag would kill me, but I’d stand close enough for her exhale to burn my eyes, and sound like totally uncool striking up a conversation while I’m clearly holding my breath waiting for diffusion and air flow to make the coast clear.