Afraid to Look-

Which pixel should you look at?

I think this image speaks volumes about life. Death, at the fringe, is in the background, but not necessarily a darkness-light is part of it too; layers of colors give us the perception of shades, gradients make it cohesive.

What am I saying? Well if you’re crying, maybe you’re happy, and if you’re hurting maybe someone hugged you a little harder than you are used to. Dying, you have the opportunity to live, and if you’re happy all the time – one bad thing might put you out.

Don’t be afraid to look in the last place you want to be – the universe doesn’t ignore any door.

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Previously this was posted without the image it was intended to be paired with*
Apologies, but it has been corrected now.

Afraid To Look

Which pixel should you look at?

I think this image speaks volumes about life. Death, at the fringe, is in the background, but not necessarily a darkness-light is part of it too; layers of colors give us the perception of shades, gradients make it cohesive.

What am I saying? Well if you’re crying, maybe you’re happy, and if you’re hurting maybe someone hugged you a little harder than you are used to. Dying, you have the opportunity to live, and if you’re happy all the time – one bad thing might put you out.

Don’t be afraid to look in the last place you want to be – the universe doesn’t ignore any door.

I Don’t Believe In Ghosts

I don’t think you are real at all,
I dreamt it up, and that is fact.
I am a writer, and my stories are exaggerated
What part of this is not fabricated?
There is no proof anywhere to be had.

Have I not always been looking to the light switches?
It was always me turning them on and off!

My hands pressed into the mattress, it was all a magic trick
The places I awoke in were just mental jewels
Constructions of an intensely vivid imagination
Of a delusional high induced state of mind.
Even in my own reality I felt the need to be haunted
Haunted, a ring in my ears, an echo I am aware,
I come to them in such a way, that leaving…
Leaving will always be my death – One last time my old friend.

Oh and you are no fun with it at all!
Straight to the point, you want me hung before dawn
If I could just drink that whiskey I’ve been saving.
I’ll just leave it to someone who’ll tell a better story;
Because as cold as you are, you won’t wait for it to chill.
Is there anything I can get you before we take this someplace more damned?
Quiet, you contemplate, but expound no words.

I love when you come around, all dressed in your absurdity,
Acting like it’s ambiguous, but we all know each other’s role.
Come my harbinger, what’s one last dance to greet the sun?
Oh well this won’t work, now will it? Deus Vult! Or does he?
Curious, I heard the Chat out on the street,
told me a little bird had learned of the greatest deed!
Your judicator has been slain! And his murderer; Me.
Who now, will preside over this atrocity? Gott ist tot!
His body slumps to the bottom of the sea.

Still here we are, not having a single stroke of luck,
Mathematical probability is not with us in this one.
You want to be desired for your money and success!
No one admits that, but it’s how they live, litmus test.
What about ghosts? If I can’t see or feel it what’s the bother?
It doesn’t whatsoever, easy to forget, forever.

Everything I need is in reach if I want;
If you ain’t eating a plate, don’t even get involved
Because I’m going all the way, won’t settle for a draw;
It’s good over here, let me show ya

The Arts To The Last Drop

Look at this! The blood is pouring out. I’m red all over – Red all over.

All this beautiful red, don’t clean it up! Dam I’ll use it still, I will

I’ll smear it here, and if I can still stand I’ll get it all over your counter.

Wouldn’t you like that? This has to be, can’t stop till I’m empty.

I’ve got this drive I can’t wind down, so I quiet it by getting out of town

Yes here, this is how I’ll go, death to an artist hungry no more.

I’ve ate my fair share of you, of the earth, and all its miraculous hues

I never rest, my heart was built for this – that’s why it seethes

You hear me quiet but inside I’m writing you a scene no one’s seen before

What is this?

I’m gasping and it’s not a kiss

I can’t fill my lungs, catch up, catch up,

I’ve made it to the counter. I’ve covered you in red flowers

And now I see what’s going on, the world is bloody exhausted of my fire

I’ll lay down!

I’m already on the cold ground.

I think my fire has backdrafted as I inhale

All this red and I astonish as I think perhaps I have fallen ill

A mind turns to fill, I am art, this is nowhere near rational

There Was Something I Wanted To Do

There are a lot of things I want to say, things I know [you] aren’t ready for. I’ve spoken in haste before – It was not pretty.

And look at you all with your fingers. Must you point any more to something other than your own. A cacophony of macaws losing their heads like the music has stopped and I’m the last one standing. I will keep mine on right, and note your terrible acting. I have to trust what I do; You can have your doubts, but I don’t need to go any further on that. Do not proceed to speak on what I meant by that to others either. I don’t deal in lies, nor the contempt they breed.

You know how I go for danger, the risk of something going to hell and the potential to be enough; It gets my blood fucking hotter than, well let’s just say hotter than a seat at the bar down with the devil. And you know how hot that seat is baby. Yes let’s not pretend. I should pause here. Yes. I will stop here. I really need to temper this patience. Maybe I’ll stop forever. Triumph, won’t you just get out of here while you still have your dignity? Disaster why do you always play the fool? You two, impostors, I will outwit the both of you!

Yes and here it is. I’ve got a few more things to pile on. Let me just put this right up here to finish the stacking; Perfect.
Now I’ll just take this heat and burn everything I know down to ash, It feels better to have nothing. It really does. When nothing becomes something, heck that feels smooth. Going back down if you can’t help it – Now that’s a bad trip. I’ll start over with not a rag in my stomach. After this you won’t hear another bit about it.

Me and death get along well, although he’s still trying to have that night cap with me; I just tell him some other time.
I know he won’t admit it, but he admires me – for all the times he’s held me close – I brought myself to his door, but unlike Faust I act before the final stroke! I tell him no matter how frail I seem in those moments, I will always have a strength greater than his grasp. I tell him even after I pass, he will not be able to remove the pen from my hand. You know I’d hold that sword so tight that even if my arm was severed my will would force my nerve and sinew to hold on! He chuckles always telling me I’m such a joker. I elbow him in the ribs – literally – and let him enjoy his ecstasy.

They’ve all been trying to kill me, the crowd. Throwing their filth and heckling the man, I am not disturbed. I have been dirty. I have been unrecognizable to myself. Now though I have found me, and I don’t much feel like getting lost in their havoctry.

Pardon me your majesty! Royal highness, you are dressed the finest – I’ll walk with you – but I do like to wear this more common thread which I know your wisdom can respect. A smile is enough to pretend. Let us now part great friends, and anytime you call on me I’ll pass along my earnest answer, for you like my enemies may share my bed.

Here we come to you, this unforgiving minute, what will we do. An hour is far too long, and anything less than eternity is not enough. Let’s settle for 60 seconds. I know, I know, it’s the same, it’s all semantics. For you I’ll give my all! I’ll fill you with my best effort. Now you may call me as you like, but I am my own and what I decide will be my sentence.

You know I’d try Romeo’s vial after Juliet’s ill fate just to see if she might have missed some – Women aren’t always better than men at finding things than they think they are.