Some People Really Do What They Love

“Life comes down to this — you can do anything, there are no limits to what you can achieve, but you do have to decide what you want to do, and then get to doing it.” – One of the secrets of life

Why are we always waiting? It is the man, the woman; who does not wait – patient – but refuses to wait, who becomes successor to the gods

I sat for a long time with this. I let the music play until I did not recognize where I had been or where I was. I am sure where I started was seeking to find that fable of all fables, but that forever eternal is a frozen moment, not much longer than the instant it takes for a molecule of water to slow down to a freeze and move back into a flow with the temperature fluctuating the way it does. It’s a complex measure, in truth, we have no measure yet to define and capture all that is encompassed; apart from perhaps that indelible mark, the arrow that always strikes true on the person who is fully human. Love; Stronger than man-rejoicing wine? More inextricably linked as they share a similar visceral – guts on the table – joy, and dichotomy of honesty & deceit ever tearing. Yes, I sat for a long time and I would offer up the notion that love can stand to measure every nuance from end to end.

Some people really do what they love,
and others are driven beyond love
because it’s not enough. To them and I both,
I offer my felicitations – a belly full of wine
when and if the time ever comes.

What are you waiting for?

 

Why Am I Gone?

People will lie in this life to make it easier for themselves

You can’t blame them because they lie to themselves too.

But the bare blunt truth? You don’t do it for me. That’s it.

There is no lie, nothing hidden in it. You just don’t work.

It is an insurmountable ledge, you must wrestle up onto.

Go ahead and get struggling. Most everyone will suffer it.

Swallow. Again.

It’s okay. Just accept that yours is a different happiness;

Different than what you are seeking. You know the truth.

We’re All gods of Love Here

Love, me lights out,
Burn the sky down
Love, me lights out,
Burn the sky down

Lure me back with waves
Pull me deep beneath the shades;
I think I’m below
Your neck is the road

Lull me you’re the eye,
Rati your sweet lips;
Oshun I beg for a drink!

Tales of the banquet–I’m drunk all over again
I’m there all one again,
The first moon, the last full notebook

I’ve been reading your words,
And after all the pages,
Only the last virgin remains.

Imagine the last time I’ll be surprised at what you say
I don’t want to listen, what if I’m swayed,
at the end, with no more words to decide against.

Xochiquetzal, Clíodhna,
Take me on a way,
Lay me down at sea!
What vastness will I be

I’ chose you and you’re gone, and that’s ironic and cliche for a song

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To be expanded

You Get Ready

The gift is this; you waited for years – at times you were so thirsty that the sand actually went down nice and smooth; it even filled all the cracks in your skin to hold you together; you stayed in the sun long enough to forget it was hot; and you drank from an oasis or two in your delusions. Even though the clear cool water was actually more sand…You grew roots to every corner, and then pushed the boundaries of your vessel further. One morning without warning water washed weariness from the entire desert – of which you drank and drank your fill. With a burst of joy you sprang from within, bringing all the vivacious colors of bloom, bounty, and blessed to the surface.

You know better than anyone what’s in the phospholipid bilayer of each cell in your body… Is it something negligible? Or is it something you decide is more? I think you’ve got so much brimming within that you can’t afford not to let your magic flow with every motion. You could turn this entire valley green with just one lick of your tongue. This sky would bleed strawberry red if you laid down in the clouds. Turn the whole world purple if you close your eyes. You want colors, and you’ll have them.

 

Don’t worry baby, we’ll find a better field to gaze up at the stars from.

I The Unseen Chills

I feel it, and wonder has it yet perforated my entire soul.
A best is that, yours or mine, best.
I wish I could have been better

Sometimes you just want selfishness
to take the last bit of air from you
and while you turn blue,
it apologizes that this time it won’t share.

You’re The Sun In My Morning

Is there light? With the shade drawn you’d never know. And that isn’t a shot at your ability to apply the proper techniques while shading. I had to say it before you started analyzing far too deep into the trenches again. Sometimes people just dig holes, love, they dig holes not to bury anything, nothing to hide. They dig because it’s in their nature; Look how you dig.

Come to me for us,
Come to me for us,
Because if you don’t come,
Something has to let up

Wrists for a powerful stature. Weak wrists can’t hold anything. Tied up or let loose.
Your hands do all the speaking I need, and your wrists don’t let whisper slip. If I were any bit of the rage I’ve decomposed I’d have a few lashings, roared up and resulting in quivers. Sage and nothing else. You are very sage.

I’ve been really a ghost,
That’s not fair to the ghosts I’ve met
I’ve been less than present,
Ive been trying to escape,
You know me I care
But I feel the reveal,
The hidden sketches
The tightest chest
Breathing is all I can do
You’ve given me so much
I admit now I can’t hold it,
At this time I don’t have a reading

All your chalk should be smeared, what essence I’ve felt smearing chalk, washed together we are now our cleanest. And smoke, just enough smoke and ash to understand the danger of this talk. What is of greater importance; What has taken place, or the potential that still has to pour out? Rain washes it away, but we go where the rain goes and that’s a long cycle to be patient for.

Who cleans the rain? Well the Earth does, and we are in part that body of land and water.

Still Trying

It was a day not so long ago,
filled with hope that all could be turned to gold,
And money wasn’t the goal,
It was all just to shine bright and bold
But dull isn’t that far off some notes

I don’t know,
I don’t know, a god dam thing,
About the colors I’ve been playing in an attempt to sing
About the chords I’m mixing in an attempt to paint
I don’t know,
I don’t know, a god dam thing
except that gelato tastes better with you than alone
(I always look forward to getting some)
And I fade to the cut-scene
where in the back she’s singing over me,
Oh my love, it’s not painful to walk
while she cringes to every step
Since my innocence flew away from me
And the goddess still comes in faith,
That after all I’ll still dance for free

Yes it was an evening painted in gemstones
under the crystal sky where an orb of light shone
and although we didn’t have much
it gave just enough to afford some special comfort
Because the real value of something is in what you see

I don’t know,
I don’t know, a god dam thing,
About the words I’ve been taking in an attempt to groove
About the steps I’m penning in an attempt to commune
I don’t know,
I don’t know, a god dam thing
Other than gelato tasting better with you than alone
(With or without you I’ll look forward to getting some)

I held the weight of water in my throat,
Put it down don’t carry this any longer – the lungs are strong

I’m not well off, but i’m moving forward and that’s better than most

I Always Liked The Light Show

I’m not much for staying quiet, the forces of nature know my mind is turning; and it must flow. I can not sit by the banks and hold all the water to my self. I’m not much for being pushed either. I’m patient – But that patience does has an end it seems. I never minded watching with some contemplation. I just took too long to churn the situation.

I lit the fuse about 20 seconds ago. I know I should have given a heads up, but I think you know the spark has been running. I’m not quite sure what it was, but we’ll see soon what I’ve set off.

When I’m in the dark,
When I’m in the dark my heart fails
A couple bumps, and I think I need a kilo;
So much weight I could push the scales –
Take my evening strolls to the chimeras’ lair.
Let’s skip to the full moon! It’s a short fair

And now I know what it is I am preparing for.
One night, when I awake at 3 A.M. unable to slip
back into dreams – I will look beside me, and there you will be
Sleeping peacefully near – and suddenly,
The madness of it all won’t seem so lonely.

Did you see the flash! There it is another one! What doom we saw and called it beauty!
I do remember all the times I let us slide, I have learned though now that there was never any time. No time to sit and watch. I had to taste you in the moment right before getting lost. Because in the blink of an eye it will all be gone. But dam it’s a hell of a show. Loud enough to keep the image vivid in your mind all the way home. And when we get there:

I’m going to change my galaxy
I’m going to paint a few things a bit closer, and some others further apart
I’m going to let all the colors run to where they want

When we we’re on fire, the heat didn’t really bother us.
Now it’s hard to ignore the burns, but I’m still walking.

 

Last Night I Think I Lost My Patience

I put my hands around you, I’ve got to get a handle on you
Nothing but respect, that’s all I do
So I don’t want to be seen sideways
When you look at me like I don’t make the sense that we’re talkin,
measure the cut, did I forget something?
Am I making you work too hard for me

You look tired. You look tired.
Lie to me, lie with me, get your fucking fix
You look tired. You look tired.
She pulls me in all directions, I swear without her I’d be just a point
on a map
You look tired. You look tired.
It never really mattered too much to me. I don’t untangle your hair like I used to
You look tired. You look tired.
I was desiring, as the urge burned within me for a taste

Cutting on the board, orchestrate my heartbeat with her waving fingers, as she moves hair out of her face; The person I am when I’m with you, sans all the other shit;

Her whole world is so much richer than mine, The sounds I hear are not as textured nor do they go as deep. Maybe I’m too worried about the hideous monsters still drinking tea at my table; Admit I’m the fucking lightening!

Well darling it’s water again. Clear, transparent as your body kneeling before his. The thing about our actions is they are not solely our own; We, in this complicated prestige, take the role in a play. Some people are not capable of living with secrets, because they don’t know the ways of concealment. I have read your diary. I have written several of its passages. You have divulged sufficient soul and I can expound on it. And now the thing I must draw out, is how I should let it sink to the ocean floor. God wouldn’t that be a riot! I’d say come along for the fun, but I wouldnt want to get sidelined at my own send-off. You don’t want to dance with me anyways; I don’t think you’re my style. So I’m going to go slam some Hennesey, and move front ways back ways till I’m sure I’m taking the right one. Because choices in the dark are always the ones that we want.

Secrets really leave no mark, I can not say the same for wounds.

I’ve been lost and I’ve been high, and both of them have had me wondering why

You Have To Wonder About All The Hoopla

We all just want to feel complete. We all just want to feel that in the end, we didn’t leave someone who was genuine with us high and dry; On the sand, to cook in the sun, where the waves of promise left us. We don’t want that for anyone.

Well what if this is the final resting point? Oh ask it again when your time is up. If you really want to get off here, then go ahead and do it fast! If you don’t want to keep going then don’t. The ride has places to get. I don’t need wavering convictions – I need only the man who will show up and stand through everything that tries to bury him. If this happens to be the final resting point, it will have to wait until I march my tried body back from where I’m taking it.

I’m trying not to leave much of this period. I don’t want to mar the history. I don’t want to give credence to all the dark suits. I really don’t want to ever admit my light dipped low.
I do suppose a surging light to bat back the vile could echo far out through the space of it all – Even if everything is only a flash

I promise there is something glimmering;  faint as it might be, you’ll find it.